The 35 Minutes That Sum It Up Best: Motivational Karaoke, "Spring Training Eve"

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Today while driving around South Austin, my iPod bringed me a blast from me past.  A 35-minute segment of Motivational Karoke, the WESN radio show that Chris Golwitzer and I painstakingly crafted from 2002-2005.  It wunt crafted.  It wunt no pain. Part 5 of "SPRING TRAINING EVE (2/22/04) just seemed to sum up what we were about. It starts with an interview with Ted Leo after he blew out his voice in Champaign and I finished the singing for him.  That ends with a clip of Babe Ruth with a fake swear word beeped in. We played Ted Leo quite a bit. A new song that's old now. A lengthy, lie-riddled microphone break, back-selling a lot of things that we used to play.  A tongue lashing of the DJs on before us. An explanation of what Google is and how to spell it, followed by the futile spelling of our very long impossible find website. We were doing Dream Warriorisms then because we were on from 12-2am at that time.  We went retro and pulled out...
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How’s the Year So Far? Better than ‘99?

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Dear New Years Day ‘99,

You dumped a lot of snow on me.  It was Christmas break and no one else was in my apartment building at 99 W. Phoenix in Normal, IL.  For awhile, I was trapped inside the building.  Very few things outside were open anyway.

I had little food in the house, just Ben Zinnen’s cans of creamed corn.  He loved that style of corn.

We had no incoming television signal.  Just a few horrible VHS tapes and 1998 interweb aol.com... and the telephone.  God bless that telephone.

I ran the tape machine and it collected analog signals of my mind slipping away.  It really did start to slip away.

By the time someone showed up to rescue me, all I had left was for Melanie and Alyssa to do some readings from Playboy over classical music.

You inspired me to make the least jamming tunes of my life.  You got me to call Jason Vandegraft.

It was just madness, and maybe not worthy of time travel, but it was 19 years ago today that your hold on me ended.  I remember Cityline.  I remember you.

You buried my car.

Listen to yourself:

“YOU MAKE ME EMBARRASSED TO BE A HUMAN BEING.”

“HOT DOGS.”

“ENJOYING YOUR TIME.”

“AGAIN.”

And the epic...

“SNOWSTORM OF ‘99.”

Shame on you.

Sincerely,

Nick Roseman, age 22. 01/04/99

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